This column is written for The Stray Ferret by Kate Simpson, who’s 16 year old daughter, Tess,  graduated from Henshaws College a few years and is now able to live independently in a assisted living home. Kate is a fundraiser for Henshaws charity.

Our daughter Tess is Autistic. At the age of sixteen, as if her plate were not already full enough, a rare brain tumour left her with a severe visual impairment and an array of complex medical conditions we had never even heard the names of.

So, in the very beginning of all this strangeness, I felt my heart begin to quicken, to skip the odd beat and send hurtling, through my whole body, an all too familiar and  overwhelming sense of dread and a very specific kind of fear. How was I going to protect her from, explain to her about, and minimise the impact of this brand-new imposter in her life? Throughout her diagnosis, illness, operations, and treatments we had made all the decisions for her. We did the research, we had the conversations, we set the time scales and we made the plans. Most importantly, we were able to defend her world and keep it as comfortable, and as safe as was humanly possible.

This was going to be hugely different. This was completely outside of our control.

Peculiarly, that substance called Adrenalin, which seemed to be almost bursting from my every vein is one of the things which Tessa’s body is no longer able to produce, and a main reason for her highly compromised immune system. We knew the letter was coming.

How could I possibly begin to shelter this independent young woman, no longer under our roof and happily going about her daily life in her assisted living accommodation?

Of course, her physical safety has been a huge concern. For Tess, contracting Covid would be truly life threatening.  Fortunately, I learnt incredibly early in her journey along the path to independence that unless I could let go and employ the “trust” factor, that journey would be short and unfulfilled. This situation was calling for a whole different level of trust.

Should we bring her home, tear her away from the place and the people she now felt so secure with. If we did, could we keep her safer. Would we be setting her back; would she ever want to go through the process of leaving us again. Could we even cope with working from home and a full time Tessa. Could she cope with a full time Mum and Dad?

When the letter landed on the door mat, we were told that we would not even be able to visit her for twelve long weeks. The one thing I knew with absolute certainty was that Tess would never be able to understand this. Her life, overnight, had been stripped of all routine and security. There were no outings or external activities. No trips, even to McDonalds, and familiar smiles had been covered with anonymous blue face masks.

Because we were both self-isolating, we were able to successfully challenge the decision. For someone with an adrenal insufficiency, increased levels of stress can be just as detrimental to physical health as any external virus or resulting illness. We have been incredibly lucky. Our girl has been able to come home every Saturday for love and cuddles and a slice of normality. We have been able to give her our own brand of emotional support, as well as support her staff and carers to deliver theirs. I cannot begin to imagine how life during this time could have been for us, has been, for so many others.

Tess is fit and well and coping brilliantly. We have found ways to overcome some of the challenges and to live alongside the others.

My heartbeat, along with the rest of the population’s, is as regular as current circumstances allow, because once a week, I get to hear hers. To feel hers and to see it radiate out in her smile.

Kate’s experiences of Tess’ care at Henshaws have resulted in her being a fundraiser for them. Want to help support those – likes Tess – living with disability? You can donate online at www.henshaws.org.uk

A tough year lies ahead for charities in the Harrogate district after swathes of fundraising events were cancelled due to the coronavirus outbreak. 

From supporters taking part in the London Marathon to their own community activities, charities rely heavily on numerous events in their annual calendars. 

Now, with almost every event being cancelled because of the coronavirus crisis, many are left wondering how they will meet their costs. 

Stephen Tongue, director of fundraising at Henshaws, said:

“We have got all our usual costs and additional costs of getting back-up staffing and deep cleaning areas – that’s quite expensive.

“It’s a challenging time. We do have some money coming in, but there’s a huge question mark over so many events.”

The charity held an art auction in early March and, even then, attendance was only around half of what was expected. Meanwhile, several upcoming fundraisers have been cancelled, including Knaresborough Beer Festival in May. 

Stephen is hopeful two outdoor events – a golf day at Rudding Park and a Yorkshire Three Peaks walk – will be able to take place in June and July, depending on government advice at the time. Its corporate donations, however, may also dwindle over the coming weeks as SMEs in the Harrogate district – a key source of support to Henshaws – struggle to find spare cash. 

To make up the shortfall and meet the additional needs of its students during the crisis, Henshaws has launched a new fundraising appeal.

For Open Arms Malawi, which sends around £500,000 per year out to its projects in the African nation, the worries are just as severe. Founded by Harrogate couple Neville and Rosemarie Bevis in 2000, it still has strong links with the town and relies on local people to contribute to its work with orphaned children. 

Ashville College has been a long-term supporter of Open Arms Malawi, sending students to volunteer there last summer

Fundraising manager Claire Collins said: “We were having a really good year for fundraising and just starting to look at new and different activities. Everything has been cancelled – all the challenge events, runs, and activities in the schools which support us. 

“We have two corporate partners who do trips to Malawi to see how funds are helping and donate significant amounts to us. They still want to support us, but without the trips it’s very difficult: when people see the work, they become really big advocates for what we do.” 

The charity has two infant homes, 10 nursery schools and five family homes for older children, as well as an outreach programme supporting families in the community. As yet, there are no confirmed cases of coronavirus in Malawi but, with high numbers elsewhere in Africa, all the homes and schools are taking extra precautions with hand washing and cleaning procedures. 

“HIV is still a big problem in Malawi, along with malnutrition,” said Claire. “Coronavirus is a huge risk on top of that. They’re taking it very seriously.” 

Claire has set up a new page on the charity’s website to keep supporters informed about the situation in Malawi. They are hoping supporters will still feel able to contribute, despite the difficulties being faced by many families across the Harrogate district.